Monday, June 15, 2015

Game of Thrones S5 Finale

Uggg, even before the episode I am nervous.  UGGGGGGGGGG This is the end and there is so much story to tell.  Predictions: Something has to be resolved for Cersei, Dany has to get ready to move on Westeros, Jamie needs to leave Dorne, Sansa somehow takes a stand on the Boltons, and Arya shows how much of a badass she really is.  These are my predictions there are 4 minutes left until the episode begins. AHHHHHH

Credits, Seems like everyone is going to be in this episode....YAAAAAAYYYY
Fucking Melisandre I hope there is a special place in hell for her.  YAY Half of the men deserted Stannis right after he burned his own daughter at the stake.  WOO HOO!  WOO HOO I told you so!!!!!!!  He sees his wife, Selyse, hung herself in the woods.  Then we hear Melisandre took a horse and rode off into the woods.  Stannis decides he and what is left of his army (about a quarter of what left Castle Black) will still march on Winterfell.  Without so many of their men, they get slaughtered.  While waiting in the forrest above Winterfell, Brienne comes upon an injured Stannis.  Stannis is still alive in the wood and Brienne asks him if he killed Renley with blood magic.  Stannis acknowledges that he did did kill his brother and Brienne says it is her duty to put him to the death.  We see her swing the sword but then there is a cut scene.  We do not know for sure if she did it or not. WOOO FRACKING HOOOOO!!!!!!!

Now there are theories all over the place in if Stannis is alive or if he is dead.  I can see both sides.  Brienne LOVED Renley so killing Stannis would be justice and even a bit of vengeance.  BUT, Brienne is loyal to Catelyn and trying to protect Sansa.  Stannis is a good military tactician and is enemy of the Boltons who currently hold Sansa hostage.  The enemy of my enemy is my friend.  There have been moments of great forethought on the part of Brienne but mostly she is a woman of action not thought.  Since her story differs GREATLY from the books, I am not sure where they are taking her.

Jon and Sam are talking and Sam asks to go to Old Town to become a Maester.  Jon reluctantly agrees to let him go and train.  We see Sam, Gilly and Baby Sam leave for Old Town.

Sansa uses the corkscrew (?) to pick her lock.  She sneaks across the yard to the broken tower where she lights the candle for Brienne.  At this time Brienne is watching the Boltons march upon Stannis.  Sansa sees this from the tower and decides it is time for her escape.  She is stopped by Ramsay's girlfriend, Myranda and Reek.  Myranda tries to torment Sansa.  Sansa for once stands her ground and says if she is going to die she would rather die while there is still some of her left.  WOO HOO Sansa.  Myranda torments her more and then sees Ramsay come back.  Reek picks up Myranda and throws her over the rampart.  SPLAT.  Her brains are leaking everywhere.

~~~~~~~~~~~ SIDENOTE- see, you see Myranda die, you see her brains splattered everywhere.  Dead, she is DEAD.  Now there is still question over several other people in this story as you do not actually see them dead.  Just think about it, The Hound, The Mountain, Stannis just to name a few. ~~~~~~~~~~~

Theon then grabs Sansa's hand and they go running.  They decide to jump off of the side of the castle-into a snow drift - I hope- and that is the end of Theon and Sansa.

We go back to the brothel in Bravos where Meryn Trant is beating three young girls with a switch.  The first two let out a wail and the third does not make a sound.  He beats the third one a couple of times and then dismisses the other two.  The third one then takes out a small knife and stabs him repeatedly.  She takes off her face and it is Arya.  She goes on stabbing him in the eyes, belly, back and face before disclosing who she is.  She then slits his throat.  WOO HOO.  This is the first person on her list that she has actually killed herself.  There have been others that have died at the hands of others (Joffrey) and there are those that are questionably dead (the Hound).  WTG ARYA!  Arya then returns the face to the House of Black and White and is met by the other girl who helps her wash bodies and Jaqen H'ghar who tell her she has stolen a death from the many faced god and then Jaqen drinks poison.  Arya freaks and cries and the girl asks her why she cries and Arya tells her that Jaqen was her friend and the girl laughs and her face changes into Jaqen.  Arya then rips the faces off of the corpse until she comes across her own.  Jaqen tells her since she was not ready, the face she took from the many faced god is poison to her.  Arya then states she can not see and shows her eyes go to all white.  AHHHHHHH!

We are off to Dorne.  Jamie and Myrcella are setting off on their journey to King's Landing.  They have a departing posse of Prince Doran, Ellaria and the Sand Snakes.  Ellaria kisses Myrcella on the lips and tells Myrcella she hopes Myrcella has a long and happy life.  We get on the boat and Jamie awkwardly tries to tell Myrcella that he loves her and that he is her father.  Myrcella tells Jamie that she knows Jamie is her father and that she is glad.  AWWWW something happy in the final episode.  NOT! Myrcella then gets a nosebleed and faints.  Ellaria and the Snakes are on the dock and Ellaria gets a nosebleed and then wipes her nose and then her lipstick off and takes the antidote bead off of her necklace and drinks it.  Meanwhile the ship is out to sea.  HA HA HA this is how Joffrey died too.  WTG Cersei, get both of your kids killed by the same poison.  LOLOLOL

Is Myrcella dead?  Will they find the antidote? Hmmmmmmmm... I have to say this, Poor Jamie.  He has had nothing but a pain in the ass since Cersei decided to kill Robert.  Hell maybe since he threw Bran out of a window.  Because Ned told Cersei he knew about the childrens' parentage, Cersei sent Jamie after Ned and then had to go to war-he got captured-was set free by Catelyn-was behanded-made it back to King's Landing where his beloved (Cersei) wanted nothing to do with him and sent him away-see nothing but one giant pain in the ass.

Meereen.  Grey worm and Missandei are on the move and come into the throne room (?) where Tyrion, Jorah, and Daario Naharis are.  They discuss what to do with the missing Dany and with Jorah, whom she exiled.  It is decided after much insult and argument that Jorah and Daario will leave to go find Dany.  Tyrion, Missandei and Grey Worm will stay to try and fix the problems in Meereen.  Since Missandei is Dany's confidant and Grey Worm is one of the people, they will help Tyrion be recognized by the people.  Tyrion will of course be the brains of the operation.  After the discussion Tyrion makes it out to the balcony where he is found by Varys.  YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYY it is so good to have them back together.

Daenerys is on a mountain top with Drogon.  Drogon seems to have made a nest of bones for himself.  Dany is asking him if he is hurt and how far he took her.  She tries to climb onto Drogon's back to take her home to Meereen. Drogon promptly bucks her off.  I think he is still injured and tired from the battle.  Let him rest awhile.  She decides to wander down the mountain to the green hills.  DURRH why wander that far from your dragon?  She then hears a horse.  Suddenly she is surrounded by Dothraki.  She sees them coming and drops her ring to the ground.  Significant?  I assume so as they showed it.  AHHH HA I got it!  Drogon took her north to the great plains called the Dothraki Sea.  Dany kept telling Drogon he needed to take her home-to him, he was born from the burning of a Khal of the Dothraki in the Dothraki desert so this might be what he sees as home.  Well, we shall see what happens.

Cersei, Cersei, Cersei. Na Nah Nee Boo Boo.  You look like poo poo.  Cersei confesses to the High Sparrow that she slept with Lancell but denies she slept with Jamie.  She tries to blame it on Robert and the Sparrow will have none of it.  HA! The Sparrow tells her she will need to be put on trial.    He tells her she can return to the Red Keep after her atonement.  The maids cut off all of her hair and bathe her.  They take her outside and take her dress off and make her walk the long walk to the Red Keep to see Tommen.  During her walk you see lots of naked folks mocking her and calling her names.  The people of King's Landing do not really like her as they were throwing all sorts of things at her and screaming all forms of vulgarity.  Rather nice.  Finally Cersei makes it to the Red Keep to be greeted by Qyburn who brings her a cloak and introduces her to the newest member of the King's Guard who is a zillion feet tall.  The new guard has a very purple face and has taken a vow of silence.  Frankenstein's Mountain anyone?  Qyburn fixed-ish Gregor Clegane.  Hmmmmmmmmmmmm.  Honestly, letting Cersei go back to her seat of power was a mistake on the part of the High Sparrow.  From here, Cersei has her friends and those that are loyal-ish to her.  If she wanted, Cersei could flee King's Landing or find ways to be a bigger pain in the ass.  Who knows what she will do.  I am glad that she got humiliated though.  Still, this was NOT enough to pay for all of her misgivings.  Was this even enough punishment for killing Robert?  I think not.  Certainly it is not even close to enough for what she (and Joffrey) did to Ned and the rest of the Starks.

The end has come.  Melisandre comes to Castle Black where Davos is trying to persuade Jon Snow to send the Wildlings to fight with Stannis.  Jon says no.  Davos confronts Melisandre who looks very morose and she says nothing.  Jon is in his office when Olly comes running in telling him that a Wildling has recently seen Benjen Stark and Benjen is still alive.  Jon of course follows him outside to see.  He is greeted my Allister Thorne.  They take Jon to a sign labeled Traitor.  There are a group of 7 or so watchmen and they all stab Jon.  Olly is the last.  What a fucking pissant.  I can not wait until the white walkers eat your sorry ass piece of shit.  I hope the giant tears Allister Throrne limb from limb-VERY SLOWLY or even does the Ramsay Bolton-Reek thing with him.  Meanwhile Jon is laying in the snow bleeding out.


Recap:  HOLY SHIT THAT WAS AWESOME!!! I can not believe it is over.  HOLY COW.......more, I need more.

Jon Snow... is he dead?   I think not.  Why else would have Melisandre come to Castle Black?  Certainly not for Davos, she knows he hates her.  Melisandre is not the only lover of the Lord of Light.  We have seen others bring people back from the dead.  Why not Jon?  Also, where the hell is Ghost?  I am sure Jon will be fine.  I am truly not worried at all.  Besides, if Bran can Warg, why not Jon?  Just sayin.

Sansa, did she and Theon survive the jump?  Hell, who knows, I would hope so but so far this is a giant story of "Shit on anyone named Stark" so it would not surprise me if they did not survive.

 Myrcella-I think she is going to die....need to keep Dorne relevant and HOPEFULLY piss of Jamie enough that he will take it out on Cersei. Besides, King's Landing at war with Dorne, WOO HOO.  More people against Cersei, the better.

Cersei, who really knows?  I hope she gets dysentery from all of the glack thrown at her.  I hope she dies a slow painful death, will that happen?  Hell no it will not.  I can not wait to see if there is more shit thrown at her though.  Metaphorically or not.

Dany- I think she is going to become friends with the new Dothraki and make a home, albeit temporary, in the Dothraki Sea.  I think Tyrion, Varys, Missandei, and Grey Worm will start rounding up  the Sons of the Harpy and send them to King's Landing HA HA HA.  Probably not, but I think they will bring a bit of order to Meereen before they leave.

Arya, I think she is going to get her sight back and be a big badass.  I hope she continues her training and finds her own ways to right the wrongs done to her and her family.

As for my predictions, I got 4 out of the 5 right, not too shabby.

OHHHH Season 5, you were a bit slow in the beginning.  I know the pieces had to move around the chessboard and all, I get it.  You have been great to us and I can not wait to see you again in 10 months.

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